So you’re engaged, now what?

so you're engaged, now what? / a thousand threads

I know you’re so excited, and you should be, but don’t run out and start booking your vendors right away. You’re going to want to get your bearings first, create a plan… you can’t do anything until you’ve got a guest list and a venue anyway. So sit back, relax, have a glass of wine with your new fiancé. You have time.

2 // You’ve waited a while, right? Like a month? At least? Okay… start thinking about the stuff.

You’re going to have to decide on a few basics first – like, say, what is it that you (and your fiancé – it’s their day as much as it’s yours) want? Do you want an intimate celebration with just your closest family and friends? Or do you want a massive throwdown with half the town and cousin Jimmy you haven’t seen since you were 5. It’s up to you, your fiancé, and maybe your respective parents (if they’re paying, they get to have a say). Take some time to think about this stuff, because it’s going to dictate nearly everything else.

Again… you have lots of time. Even if you’re planning on a short engagement, you’ll only get yourself into trouble by rushing to throw down a deposit.

3 // Okay, you can throw down a deposit.

But just one. Get that venue nailed down. Once you have your venue, everything else will start to fall into place.

4 // You now have permission to use Pinterest.

Start filing away your favorites. Favorite colors and styles, favorite vendors, favorite picture ideas. Start making your boards, but wait a bit to book. Reach out to the vendors you love, get their estimates, and start formulating a plan.

Again, if you rush to put a deposit down with that photographer who’s a little expensive, thinking you’re going to be able to save money on the food that you haven’t priced out, you’re going to get yourself into trouble. Ask your favorite vendors to mark your date and let you know if they have any other inquiries – you want first dibs, but you also want to be sure. Don’t worry, they’ll be cool.

5 // Book ‘em, and invite your friends.

Once you have a full (or nearly full) set of vendors laid out, go ahead and book. This will be painful as the money slowly disappears, but it will also be so ridiculously exciting you’ll barely be able to stand it.

You can also send your save the dates. At this point, the guest list should be pretty secure.

6 // Deal with the pretty stuff.

Get the dress, start on the décor… put those Pinterest boards to use. You’re almost there! Try to remember to relax and continue to take things slow. At this point, you’ve put a lot of time in to make things beautiful, and they will be – the world won’t end if you can’t finish that 400th Kleenex floral arrangement that Aunt Sally will just love.

Image via.


  1. Posted August 21, 2013 at 12:46 pm | Permalink

    This is pretty perfect. I asked John to rank various aspects (food, music, paper, flowers) as high, medium and low importance to him–not a single thing was below “medium-high”!

  2. Posted August 21, 2013 at 3:45 pm | Permalink

    Seriously pinterest had just started when I got engaged and it quickly became sensor overload for me. Don’t get overwhelmed with all the ideas/stuff on the Internet….narrow down what is most important to you 🙂 –
    Funny enough I still pin to my wedding inspiration board even though I have been married for over 2 yrs
    -alecia from

    • Laicie
      Posted August 27, 2013 at 7:53 pm | Permalink

      Hehe me too Alecia! It’s still fun to look. 🙂

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