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The Pros and Cons of Living in a Stepford Neighborhood

a thousand threads
I love our neighborhood. It’s quiet, beautiful, lots of young families with white picket fences… it’s eerily perfect, and I wonder fairly frequently which husband might be pumping out robotic beauties in the basement (maybe those ones that are always at the pool…).

So, along with a few shots we snapped last night on a little family walk, I thought I’d share some pros and cons that go along with living where we do…

a thousand threads
Pro: There are bunnies.

So many bunnies. I’m almost positive they truck them in.

Whoever is running the show around here knows that those squirrels are just rats in cuter suits — that just won’t do — so the bunnies are abundant… and the squirrels, well, I guess they know their place.

a thousand threads
Con: The chihuahuas are very dangerous.

“A resident has reported that on the morning of April 4, she was walking on Spicebush Drive when she was bitten by a dog on a leash.  The dog was possibly a chihuahua, and the bite was relatively severe.  The dog was being walked by a man, and he had two dogs with him, both small and brown.  Due to concerns about rabies and other infections, we are seeking information about the dogs and their owner.  If you have any information on who might have been walking two small brown dogs on April 4, on or near Spicebush Drive, please contact the community manager so that we can pass the information along to the doctors involved.  Your assistance is appreciated.”

a thousand threads
Pro: Tiny goats will mow your lawn.

We’re fans of adorable animals doing adorable things here (as long as it’s not those damn chihuahuas). These fat little guys come around a few times a year to clear the brush.

Con: Santa might steal your identity.

Clearly, these two issues were made for a side-by-side announcement (one that went out last December). Merry Christmas.

Community Tree Lighting – Santa Claus is Coming to Town!

Join your neighbors for cocoa and caroling as we light the community Christmas tree in front of the Fat Oxen.  Santa has graciously agreed to make an appearance, so bring the kids and your camera and grab a photo with the Man In Red.

Identity Theft Issues

Six months ago a number of our residents were victims of identity theft. Please be aware that it has been reported that the same problems are returning. You can minimize your risk by following these ten tips…”

a thousand threads
Pro: There are palm trees at the pool.

It’s fine, nobody will know that they’re plastic.

Also a pro… if you get tired, you can go have a float on the lazy river.

a thousand threads
Con: There might be bears.

I can only guess that the bear that was spotted a few weeks ago must have somehow caught word of all the bunnies.

12 Comments


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